Mother and Son Fight for Sexual Relationship. Where does feeling end and logic begin?
By Georgann Ryan (Internet Pilgrim)
In the US, the recent case of Monica Mares, 36 and Caleb Peterson, 19, has raised a storm of controversy as this mother and son have begun to fight for their “right” to have a sexual relationship. They have been charged with violating the New Mexico statute against incest and are scheduled to be tried this fall. In the meantime, they’ve been ordered to stay away from one another.
Yet although Mares’ eight (!) other children have been taken and she has lost rights to visitation, she states, “He is the love of my life and I don't want to lose him. My kids love him, my whole family does. Nothing can come between us not courts, or jail, nothing.” If she must choose between her other children and her “lover” there is no choice according to her – it will be Peterson.
Mares gave up Peterson, who then was named Carlos, for adoption when he was an infant. They met 18 years later after he searched for his birth mother. She brought him to her home and eventually they began a sexual relationship. Peterson has stated that, “Sometimes the easy way isn't the best way…Sometimes we have to make that life decision that's going to change and affect everything but when it comes down to it, it's worth it.” He’s correct that the easy way isn’t always the best way, but his understanding about what’s easiest is confused, at best. It’s easier to give in to feelings than to recognize that they’re wrong, though his confession that he still sees her as “mom” in some respects should be a clue.
Another highly publicized case is from the UK, where Kim West, 51, began a relationship with her son Ben Ford, 32, after a similar situation arose. Ford left his wife for the relationship with his mother, and now after maintaining that the sex is “incredible and mind-blowing,” the two vow they will marry and have children together, even though it’s illegal under the UK’s 2003 Sexual Offenses Act, which carries a 2 year prison term for violation. The pair now live in Michigan, where they can be given life sentences for their actions.
Couples who indulge in this behavior claim that it isn’t incest but “genetic sexual attraction,” GSA. Yet in this new progressive world we’re entering, changing the term doesn’t change the behavior or the revulsion that is inherent within most people toward it. Barbara Gonyo founded a support group and coined the term in the 1980’s, after meeting her son for the first time in 26 years. Yet these situations have remained limited to a few people in the shadows until recently.
But now, once again we’re seeing “progressives” take up a sex-related cause, bolstered by a media eager to change inborn programming which makes most people recoil in disgust. Yet without objective moral standards, acceptance and tolerance of anything is the new norm, and those who feel this disgust are vilified. “Who are we to judge?” has become the battle cry in the drive toward acceptance.
By focusing on the most extreme and sympathetic instances of people suffering because of sexually-related issues, society has become convinced that the solution is to accept almost any behavior in the name of tolerance, and turn a blind eye to the conduct. The problem is that this doesn’t impact only the consenting adults involved, but everyone around them, and society as a whole.
The story of 19th century Emeline, in the video above, is illustrative because we naturally feel sorry for a woman who suffered so severely. Was hers a society that was repelled by these acts? Yes. Were they right to be repelled? Yes. But their response didn’t reflect true Christian compassion, merely an emphasis on moral and legal failings. That’s where we’ve been deceived. Throwing out the idea of Christian culture isn’t the answer, but becoming more Christ-like is. His response to the woman caught in adultery is instructive,
When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, “Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee?” She said, “No man, Lord.” And Jesus said unto her, “Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.”
These cases are interesting for a number of reasons; one is the media focus on them and on similar cases coming to light. Since emboldened by the transformation of society, people no longer are hiding their activities but demanding their “right” to have their behavior celebrated. Attempts to convince the public to see this as normal, in the same way as homosexuality, and then transgenderism, have been “transformed” not only have “normalized” these behaviors but forced them upon us until we’re considered phobic if we still feel revulsion and have an inner voice telling us that these are not good things.
For those who follow the Bible, we’ve been all but ostracized, as the Word of God itself has come under attack for its “outmoded” forms of thought and bigotry. Yet the prohibitions in the Bible are there for good reasons. What has changed hasn’t been our sophistication, advancing knowledge or compassion, but our toleration for sin.
Mares and Peterson are asking the public to help fund the legal fight for their “love” and at least some of the public are supporting them. “Cristina Shy, a leader of a support and advocacy site for incestuous relationships (yes, that's a real thing), has also stepped in to support Mares and Peterson, citing the same-sex marriage Supreme Court ruling as grounds for legalizing incest.” Proponents of same-sex marriage dismissively argued that it never would lead to a slippery slope, yet less than a year after the decision, here we are.
The press has noted that with sperm donation at an all-time high and new rules allowing for children to seek out their biological parents after age 16, this phenomenon will become widespread. According to one author, we should search for psychological treatments for these suffers because it is “as if their feelings are impossible to change. There have been heartbreaking cases of families broken apart by GSA. It’s an affliction; a curse for all those involved.”
Though as New Day, which broke the story on West and Ford ask, “Is this mum morally wrong, or are they victims of a recognized psychological syndrome?” But does it matter and is there really a difference? We’ve become prone to see people with sin problems as people who can’t change their feelings or circumstances, who must give themselves over to whatever lusts begin to consume them. Yet there is an answer for these problems, though it isn’t found in changing societal perceptions or instituting psychological treatment. It’s in being born anew through Christ - but in its newfound wisdom, modern society shuns that solution.
As to Mares, with this many children, obviously she isn’t particularly well-informed or concerned about birth control. And therein lies the main reason for all of the prohibitions against incest. Clearly it is against God’s law, but it also has been against the temporal law in virtually every jurisdiction for good reasons. It can cause psychological problems, but beyond this, the offspring of couples of close blood relationship are vulnerable to incredible genetic defects.
One particular child of incest comes to mind. “Johnny” was a deaf, blind, mentally ill, psycho-social dwarf, who was prone to fits of rage - but who wouldn’t be with all of those handicaps? It was nearly impossible even to find a facility which would take him to school him, and yet he couldn’t adequately be cared for at home. When one finally was located, the cost was well over $200,000 yearly. What has his life become since the state became involved in trying to find an appropriate placement for him 25 years ago? Only God knows. But that’s the point.
There are laws against incest because of the suffering (and the cost) of children born from these relationships. Society has a vested interest in preventing such unions. “Love” doesn’t trump everything else, especially when it isn’t love but mere sexual attraction; there must be adherence to moral boundaries and common sense interjected because what results isn’t “happily ever after” but suffering for everyone involved – especially the innocent victims.